


Seven Eight Nine

by OspreyEamon



Series: Golden Sun Drabbles [3]
Category: Ougon no Taiyou | Golden Sun
Genre: Gen, Humor, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-06-08
Updated: 2008-06-08
Packaged: 2017-11-05 11:33:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/405939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OspreyEamon/pseuds/OspreyEamon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What are you doing!" cried Mia horrified.</p><p>"Well, you told me that I would break my teeth on the rocks and to find something that was at least organic so-"</p><p>"Garet, you are not allowed to eat Ivan."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seven Eight Nine

After five days wandering though the caverns the adepts were finally forced to admit that they were lost.

“I should have known better than to try a short cut,” muttered Isaac sitting with his back to one of the lumpy, ice cold walls.

“Yeah, you should have. And next time you get us completely lost somewhere could you at least make sure it’s a place with some food. I’m starving!”

“We know, Garet,” was Mia’s tired reply.

“And it’s not Isaac’s fault,” Ivan added. “We need to catch up to Felix and the others before they can reach the other Lighthouses. We all agreed it was worth the risk.”

“Thanks Ivan. Still, I shouldn’t have suggested it. We’ll never catch up with them if we don’t find a way out of here soon.”

The adepts sat around in a gloomy silence which was broken when one of the djinn coalesced on Ivan’s shoulder. “Come on guys, it’s not that bad! I’m sure you’ll find the way out if you just keep on walking.” Nobody answered. Garet was looking at the creature with a similar expression to the one he wore when he smelled a second class pot roast. “Don’t get down on yourselves; it’s only a matter of time. I know how to cheer you up. What did the dough say to the baker? It’s nice to be kneaded.” The djinni looked around as the humans failed to laugh. “Here’s a better one, it’s about a wood cutter, a Great Healer and a fire adept who all go into a bar…”

And things were only going to get worse.

~ ~ ~

“What do you do with a one year old banana?”

“Eat it.”

“No, you wish it a happy birthday. Hey, what are you doing! Watch it!” Breeze disappeared from Garet’s grasp and rematerialised on Mia’s shoulder.

“Garet, the djinn are made of pure energy,” said Ivan. “You can’t eat them.”

~ ~ ~

The low rumbling grew louder until dust shook from the passage roof and stones skittered across the ground before dying away. The adepts looked around fearfully but the tunnel showed no signs of collapsing.

“That’s… odd,” said Isaac. “It felt kind of like quake psynergy but much stronger and much fainter. What do you think… no. No no no no…” He rummaged franticly for the Mars Star, found it and clenched the blood red orb between his hands staring into it intensely. The jewel winked softy up at him. Perhaps it was just his imagination, but its glow seemed brighter than it had before.

“What is it?” asked Mia.

“Do you think they…” began Ivan.

“Venus,” said Isaac wretchedly. “They’ve just lit Venus.”

“Oh, this is great! We’ve spent Kirin only knows how long stuck in this place and now they’ve beaten us to the next Lighthouse! And we still haven’t found any food.”

“Will you please shut up about food,” Ivan moaned. “We’re all hungry.”

“We’ve got to keep on moving,” said Mia. She drew a tightly rolled parchment out of her robes and began to unroll it. “Maybe if we-”

“Wait, Mia has the map? No wonder we’re lost!” Garet grabbed it off her and jerked it open. “Everyone knows women can’t read maps,” he muttered pouring over it.

“Garet-” Isaac began.

Mia held up a hand. “Just let him keep it. I don’t care. My eyes are getting sore from looking at it in this light anyway.”

“You sound like you need cheering up again,” said Breeze. “How about some knock knocks? Knock knock.” The adepts stayed silent so the Jupiter Djinn answered himself. “Who’s there? Dots. Dots who? Dots for me to know and you to find out.” Garet started walking back the way they’d come and the other three followed. “Knock knock. Who’s there? Amos. Amos who? A mosquito bit me. Knock knock...”

~ ~ ~

“What are you doing!” cried Mia horrified.

“Well, you told me that I would break my teeth on the rocks and to find something that was at least organic so-”

“Garet, you are not allowed to eat Ivan.”

~ ~ ~

“Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?”

“I didn’t hear anything.”

Ivan concentrated. “It was a kind of a … boom. Kind of like thunder but different. From up there.” He pointed to the ceiling. “It felt kind of … funny. The air kind of moved.”

“Ivan, are you just trying to see how many times you can say ‘kind of’ in one minute,” said Garet suspiciously.

“No! I can’t quite explain it. It was ki- It was like psynergy but different.”

“Your elephant is truly amazing,” said Garet sarcastically.

“I think you meant eloquence, Garet,” replied Isaac dryly. “And yours isn’t crash hot either.”

“I’m hungry,” said Garet throwing his hands up. “How can you expect a man to think when he’s hungry?”

“But what was it?”

“I’m not sure. It wasn’t like anything I’ve ever felt before.”

Breeze used the pause in the conversation that followed to launch himself back into his comedy act. “What do call a stupid skeleton? A numb skull. Or maybe a bone head... What can’t you have for breakfast? Lunch an-”

“Look Breeze,” interrupted Isaac. “I’m really thankful that you’re still trying to cheer us up, but we really need to figure out what it was Ivan heard. So unless you have any ideas about what it was-”

“Of course I know what it was.”

“You do?”

“Sure! It was a gigantic release of Jupiter psynergy and Alchemy probably triggered by the collapse of part of the Alkimiyan Seal. We didn’t really feel much of it so it must have been a long way off but- hey, why all the long faces? Was it something I said?”

“Again. I’ve failed again,” Isaac moaned. He slipped down to the floor head in hands. “I couldn’t stop them at Mercury, I never even got to Venus and now…”

Mia knelt down beside him. “It’s not over yet,” she said gently. “They don’t have the Mars Star so there’s no way they can light the final Lighthouse and I’m sure we can find a way to extinguish the other three and repair the Seal. But you can’t give up now. We need you.” She looked up. “Garet, can we have a look at the map? Maybe we can use the direction Ivan heard the Lighthouse from as some kind of pointer … Garet?” The fire adept shifted uneasily. “Where’s the map?”

“I was really hungry, we haven’t had any proper food in ages and-”

“Garet!”

~ ~ ~

Monster stew is made by mixing the dust monsters crumble into when they die with water (courtesy of Mia) and boiling it in an old helmet over a fuel less fire (courtesy of Garet). Monster dust was grey but – for reasons the group preferred not to speculate on – the stew was brown. With green lumps in it. And the frothy crust collecting around the rim was orange.

For something derived from ash and water it had a surprised amount of body. It also had a smell which hung around the cave like Isaac’s aunt Muriel’s moth eaten scarves. Aunt Muriel had owned a lot of scarves.

The soup went gloop. The ladle reached toward it.

Even Garet was looking green.

~ ~ ~

The adepts didn’t know how long they had been trapped in the labyrinth of passages and caves. They did know however that it had been so long that they no longer had the energy to stop Garet from gnawing his own leg off.

At first Isaac thought he was imagining the foot steps and the voices that accompanied them. They sounded close, but distorted as if he was hearing them from underwater.

“Are… we’re going the right way?” “Yes… Star…” “But we’ve been… and we still haven’t…” “… almost there. Just a bit…” “Will they be…” “…doubt it.” “Can’t you at least pretend to care, Alex?” “That would be… don’t you think.” “I’m sure… they’re all…” “…you’re right Kraden.”

“Jenna?” he croaked.

“… hear something?” “That sounded like…”

The pace of the footsteps increased and a flickering light illuminated the roughly hewn ceiling.

“Isaac! Garet!” cried Jenna happily. The footsteps raced to him and then stopped. “You’ve … grown a moustache? What am I saying; are you alright? You look dreadful.”

“You can have your reunion later, business comes first. Where’s the Mars Star?”

Isaac glared up at Saturos. “Garet ate it,” he muttered finally.

“Don’t be ridiculous, the Stars are too large to fit in someone’s mouth.”

“We don’t know how he managed it.”

“It does feel like it’s over here somewhere,” Menardi – who was standing over Garet – said uncertainly. Saturos swore. Alex raised an eyebrow.

“Hey, have you guys come to rescue them? Thanks! You have no idea how boring it was getting just wandering around here day after day.” Breeze popped out of Ivan’s chest, chipper as ever. “I’ve been trying to make them feel better about the situation, but really it is pretty lousy. And they seemed to appreciate my jokes less and less the longer they were lost... maybe you’d like to hear some?” the Djinni asked brightly. “Why was the monster surprised to see cucumbers growing from his ears? Because he’d planted carrots!”

“Now that we have the Star, can we please begin to make our way out?” Alex said drawing his cloak closer to his body.

“We’re not leaving Isaac and Garet!” snapped Jenna.

“I never said we were, Jenna dear,” he replied.

“And what are we doing to do if the idiot really has eaten the Star?” said Menardi kicking Garet viciously.

“If worst comes to worst we can always throw him into the beacon,” said Alex shrugging.

“Alex!”

“But I’m sure it won’t come to that,” he continued. “If the Star could fit in one way then it’s bound to fit out another.” Saturos grimaced. “Now, which way to the egress?”

“Why are you asking me?”

“You two did lead us to them,” said Alex testily. “Finding the way back can’t be that much harder.” Saturos and Menardi didn’t say anything. Alex’s eyes narrowed. “Is what you’re failing to communicate that you have no idea how to get out?”

“We were following the aura of the Mars Star,” Menardi growled. “We thought that your superior self would be dealing with the return journey.”

“If I had known I was going to be delegated the task I would have left a trail to follow. I suppose we’d just better keep put a left hand on the wall-”

“That doesn’t work,” said Isaac weakly. “We tried it.”

“So... does anyone else have an idea?”

The adepts all looked at each other. Nobody spoke.

Except Breeze of course.

“Oh, damn,” the djinni said still sounding cheerful. “Still, I guess there’s always a silver lining. This way you’ll have the time to work out your differences about the Lighthouses in a nice, civilized manner and I get to tell more jokes. So, which one now … I got it! Why was six crying? Because seven eight nine. Get it? Seven eight nine.”

**Author's Note:**

> And because I still don’t think this is quite long enough…
> 
> Introducing Monster Stew: the Musical!
> 
> One fine day... or night (it was hard to tell underground) underneath some random mountain, a very clever adept caught a monster... and decided to make...
> 
> Monster stew,  
> Monster stew,  
> Gooey, brewy,  
> Yummy, chewy,  
> Monster stew!
> 
> I just had to put it bit in. I couldn’t help myself. The lyrics were nicked from Wombat Stew by Marcia K. Vaughan. Man I use to love that book when I was six years old…


End file.
